(I wrote this blog 5 months ago and He laid it on my heart again, only this time to enhance it.)
It's hard, hard to have a passion for things, a love for something that someone doesn't understand, and have people disregard it and call it "weird" or "not kingdom worthy".
It's hard to experience a life altering moment such as finding a relationship with the King, and having people decide what your new journey should look like.
It's hard to have people gawk, mock, poke fun, tear down, question, or even mimick, a personal relationship with a personal Savior.
It's hard to understand how personal each relationship should be and how people that have experienced the same moment can confine it to a specific box with specific specifications allowing no modifications.
It's easy as a mother to understand that each woman's birth story is completely different and entirely personal and at most times quite traumatic in it's own personal right, and we should expect the same from each other because we are literally being birthed from a Living God. How can we decide what His birth story looks like for ourselves let alone someone else?
It's hard to want very much to enjoy your birth story, welcome the new life that you are entering; but to have a lot of people around you gawking, eyes on you to see exactly what you are doing, how your new legs are working, how your new arms are stretching, how your new brain is developing. And while they are continuing to look at you, they are very seldom looking at the heart that they are watching with, the heart that is supposed to be within them going through the exact same process.
It's hard to enjoy the highs and lows because that's what He wants, for us to experience those lows and call out to Him. But when we call out to Him, we have bystanders deciding how we should reach out to Him, what His answer will be, and how that answer will play out.
It's hard to enjoy the fellowship and communion with a personal mother and father (because God acts as both), a new family, while people are saying how your new family should live, what they should eat, what they should drink, what they should enjoy, what their entire life should pretty much unfold like.
It's hard to be a part of that family with confidence, and He most assuredly wants us standing in confidence. But it's not Him breaking down our confidence, it's those around us.
It's hard to love every single moment of this new, difficult, wonderful, hard, amazing, gut-wrenching life when the people who are supposed to be a part of our new extended family, ones who we will be spending eternity with, when those people care much more about how we are living rather than about how their heart is. It's easy to understand when non-believers persecute and judge. But, when those in our new adopted family critique, judge and are unfairly mean, it's a different feeling. Sometimes, we as believers can forget that it is within that heart of ours, that very fragile organ, that bodies are birthed; unique bodies, one of a kind bodies, never to be duplicated bodies, never to look the same (well of course expect in the instance of twins, I have no revelation from Him on that one, sorry, it's just simply amazing). We forget because we begin living within that phantom box with specific specifications for our life allowing no room for modifications.
It's hard, really hard when He's given YOU that unique, genuine heart; one that may like things different than other people; may do things in different ways; may WANT to do things differently because that's the unique and genuine heart that He gave you, and to be constantly told that this heart is unworthy, not good enough, wrong, weird.
These hard things are things we need to share with each other through our "church" body and embrace within each other. And I don't mean our literal church body either; I mean the ones that accept Chrst, the ones that now claim to walk with Him--they all become the church body, His family.
He is now each of our mother and father. He is now the One that binds us together as sisters and brothers. Which means every time we critique someone else, look at someone else and judge with human eyes, we are in essence saying to God that his birthing process is unacceptable to us; to me, to you.
I don't want to say that to my Creator; to the Potter who formed me. I want to embrace all of my quirkiness; which means I want to embrace the unique, quirky personalities He instilled within others.
Comparing--it's an ugly trait. We decide what people's lives should look like and we compare it to what we are seeing.
We shouldn't be doing it in our every day lives, judging how everyone is raising their families, and we shouldn't be doing it in our relationship with Him, judging how His birthing process will look like for one another!
We have got to show more grace to each other. We have to go to start accepting each other as indivudals, and not cookie-cutter images of what we we perceive is "righteous"; as if to say that we as men and women could EVER think to say what is truly righteous.
We fall short of His righteousness every single moment. We fall short of offering the grace He expects us to offer.
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”
2 Corinthians 12:9
See, that's the magnfiicent part of Him. He doesn't fall short. His grace is sufficient; His grace instills love for others.
I want to accept my own weird, quirky traits and I long to accept your, sweet friend. What do you wish today?
No comments:
Post a Comment