Sunday, October 30, 2011

living waters

Living Water
The living breathing water, oh so refreshing, oh so cooling.
When we are empty, when our well runs dry in our sinful state, His water lifts us up physically and spiritually.
How truly wonderful it is.
Life before it was so mundane. Life with it is full, and prospering.
As I woke this morning I prayed for His Spirit to lift me, to keep me encouraged and refreshed throughout the day; it was Brian’s day to work which meant I had to get all 4 kids up and ready for church alone.
I swung my legs over the bed, walked groggily out to the couch where I sank, submerging myself in the Word.
Then, chaos began. The monsters were up and the day began. Before I knew it, the peace I had gained seemed to fade and restlessness filled me. I quickly jumped into Mommy role and accomplished my task of readying ourselves for our day in God’s house.
I threw some logs on the cozy red, burning fire and walked out the door.
Thankfully the drive to church only took about 3 minutes since we are only 1.3 miles away, for I had a headache brewing from the craziness that had ensued within the walls of our home.
          The kids ran off to Sunday school and I dropped heavily into the pew, awaiting the uplifting message I would prayerfully receive upon my entrance.
He never fails me and Sunday school was encouraging and uplifting, just what I needed after the screaming rampage that had taken place only an hour before. I admit with an extremely heavy heart that I screamed entirely too much this morning, my tone of voice was not kind and my words were harsh. I felt rushed, anxious, as if I was failing the children in a cardinal way if we were late to church which only added to the feeling of uneasy that had crept in.
He graciously filled me with His words, filled me with His waters.
{Jump to church time.}
Following Sunday school I was filled and encouraged; you’d think I would be a pleasant woman, the epitome of a Godly one right?
I chatted with my church family, felt a sweet calm radiate within me.
I found the children and saw the beams of excitement coming from them following their school time, found our way to our seat. Church began, the organ played beautifully in the background. We participated in the hymnal serenades in which His great name was uplifted to the heavens—it was magnificent!
Then came prayer—typically we have one person that prays, of course not today. Not the day when I was alone in church. Not the day that I needed smooth sailing because I had already lost my cool far too many times.
No, not today.
Today, today was family prayer time (which please DO NOT GET ME WRONG, was absolutely beautiful. Hearing the beautiful little voices of small children praying with their parents was breathtaking. My only quam was the littles sitting beside me).
Side note:  Jaxson is 4 ½ and has only been in the church with us for 2 months; before which time he was in the toddler church the entire time. I was able to focus on Jordon’s behavior then because it was only him. Now add a restless 4 year old to a hyper 8 year old, a stressed out mom (who doesn’t drink coffee) and you have one not so calm situation.
There was the dropping of books, whispering, kicking of feet, coughing and at one moment a cry of impatience (I’ll leave your imaginations to decide who that came from…).
Needless to say, by the time prayer was over, I was empty again.
The children exited the church for junior church and I humbly laid it at His feet- admitting my failure and asking for the filling of Him, yet again. My pastor spoke eloquently, giving the living words our Lord laid upon His heart.
…post church time—I was filled again.
You see, that’s the most encouraging part of our Father who art in heaven; hallowed be His name.
When we are empty, when we feel desperation creeping into our souls, we must simply take a drink of His living water, that which comes from His will, and we shall thirst no more.
We may have to drink of it multiple times a day, as I did today, but He WILL ALWAYS FILL US. We can trust Him who promised.
Now, I know this passage means drinking of the living water of salvation and we shall thirst no more of death—but I thought it fitting after the morning I had. I simply needed to stop and let Him come in me. Stop and let His power fill me; after that I thirsted no more. There would be a time when my flesh would war with His spirit again and I would need to drink again, but He has promised that his Word will always fill us.
I trust that promise because I felt the truth of it today—felt Him lift me up completely as I fell in my flesh.
I am so very sorry to my children whom I failed during my fleshly fall, but I am so thankful and grateful to the One who redeemed my soul and has counted me blameless.
His grace is always sufficient and He shows it to us in abundant ways!  
His well is ALWAYS full and He is always willing to allow us a drink to help our parched desire. 

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