Monday, October 3, 2011

My Heritage

Doodle bug, sweet, kind and loving doodle bug ... When I look into His beautiful blue eyes I see the love of our heavenly Father. When I see his tiny hands and His sweet smile, I see the amazing power our Father in heaven has. It's amazing to look at these gifts that I have and see the hands that created them. As I watch them each and every day I see the love that He has for us, the love that He pours out on us as parents. As a mother, my heart beats with these little blessings, connected with them forever. Jaxson changed my life. I don't mean to say that He changed it by himself; I give God all the glory He so richly deserves. But, I do mean that having Jaxson opened my eyes up to a life that I did not know before. Prior to Jaxson, my identity was wrapped up in the sinful existence I had lived, in the mistakes that I had lived through. After him, I saw myself in a new light, the first light that Christ was shining inside of me.

Jaxson awakened in me the desire to turn my life over to hands greater than my own. He opened up my soul to feel alive in a way that I had previously felt dead and unworthy. He led me back to the Maker of my soul, the one who had knit me together in my mother's womb and Jaxson together in mine.

My life didn't change BECAUSE of Jaxson, but it did set me on a path that led me toward an eternity with the One whom I was longing for; the one with whom I crave more of at every moment. When I watch as Jaxson dances around the house being ridiculous and silly, I am reminded of the depth that He has created us with; that we are each unique and amazing. When I watch as His face lights up around His sister or when He has accomplished a task that he has set for to do, God shows me the unending love that He has for His children and that He has instilled in each of us as well.

God created us each to be special, creatures never to be reproduced. We are each individuals and Jaxson is the first individual that God handed me. He is my love, he is my sweetheart and he is most certainly my doodle. But the most amazing thing that he is, He is first and foremost a child of God's, given to me for a short time to care for. I have no intention of taking my task for granted and I hope to raise him each day to love our Lord our God with his whole heart and that his every step shall be directed by Him.


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