Have you ever wondered, “Who am I?”
I have found myself asking this question throughout my entire life.
There were times when the answer made me shutter, brought tears to my eyes. I was broken, helpless, ugly, horrible, wretched. I hated myself.
After finding Christ, it’s been a journey all in its own right to find a healthy, authentic view of myself.
You’d think that finding Christ would give me my identity; that I would somehow “magically” know who I am.
But, it wasn’t that easy. After finding Him, the ridicule and whispers didn’t stop. The lies that I was fed continued to distort my reality.
I was accused of being a hypocrite, a liar, and a fake.
There had to come a time when I had to accept the way GOD made me and accept that He made be wonderful.
I wasn’t sure how to do this, but I knew His Word was the place to go.
“I chose you before I formed you in the womb; I set you apart before you were born. I appointed you a prophet to the nations.”
What does that Scripture say?
He chose me.
He set me apart.
He appointed me.
I am chosen, set apart and appointed to something set forth by HIM.
He knows me intimately, like no one else does. He loves me and has a plan for me. I may not always understand the plan, but I must have faith that my Father does.
The life I lived, the testimony I now have, HE KNEW IT. If for no other reason other than the help that I can give to young women living the wretched life I was living, it set me apart. He set me apart and good has come from a life that I CHOSE and He REDEEMED.
“And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.’
I love God, and because of that I was called to a purpose He set forth and He has worked all things out for good.
My life is now GOOD.
I am a sinner, redeemed by grace, HIS grace. But I am no longer separated from Him and I have been set apart for GOOD.
“You did not choose Me, but I chose you. I appointed you that you should go out and produce fruit.”
I did not choose Him, He chose me.
There is something He wants to use me for and I humbly submit to whatever it is that He has called me to.
I must accept who I used to be, and embrace who I am now.
I used to be:
A college drop out
A molestation victim
A rape victim
A drug abuser
& most importantly, “In Him I have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace.”