I have felt this stirring today to speak an encouraging word over those that are struggling with understanding that JESUS LOVES.
What a better time than on Transparent Thursday!! We all know I'm loving opening my heart and being honest with you all.
I see so much hurt, so much bondage in so many people around the world. I read "comments" on news feeds, and my heart just breaks at the truth that I see--people simply do not know that Jesus loves them. There are some that totally deny His existence, and there are some who seem to be so hurt by something in their past that their heart is just hardened to see the truth--that He is with them always.
I know for me personally, I always knew that Jesus was real, alive and my Savior. What I COULD NOT GRASP was that the mistakes I was making, the mistakes that seemed to fill my existence didn't negate that I was loved by Him. They actually only affirmed them.
I remember during my college years, my self-loathing was the worst. The sexual immorality was where it started. After I was raped, my heart seemed to stop beating at times--not physically of course but emotionally. I could stop myself from thinking of Him, drawing closer to Him, and it made it easier to sink further and further into this world that I used to make myself "happy". I felt so dirty after I was raped, I felt like people could literally LOOK at me and see filth, so it made it so much easier in my warped, twisted mind to be the woman I thought everyone already knew I was. I stopped talking about God or Jesus with anyone, I stopped praying, and I did two things--I drank, heavily, and I had sex, a lot of it.
This was the enemy's plan to keep me from drawing closer to God. He wanted me to feel filthy, so that I wouldn't open my eyes to the reality that Jesus loved me EVEN THEN. Yes, His desire was for me to stop being sexually immoral, but His desire MORE was that I simply draw closer to Him. Drawing closer to Him was the ONLY way I was ever going to be able to stop doing what I was doing.
Jesus--He is the only one that can change our desires.
Jesus--He is the only one that can ever make us "feel" worthy.
Jesus--He COUNTS US WORTHY.
Let me ask you, sweet friend, how do you feel about yourself? When you look in the mirror, do you see a royal priest/priestess? Do you see a holy vessel? Do you see a beloved man/woman of the one true King?
That's what you should see! That's what we should all see!
I still struggle on days to see her. There are still days that the enemy and my flesh try and convince me that these things are not true, that the mistake I just made with my husband, or the mistake with my children, or even the mistake that I made all of those years ago negates Jesus' love for me.
It's not true! It's a total and utter lie that we cannot give any weight to. We must rebuke those lies!
I don't care how many friends or family members have said you are disgusting, I don't care how many friends or family members have told you they won't accept your apology and that you will always be the same horrid person THEY BELIEVE you are--IT IS NOT TRUE.
It is a LIE! Those are lies from the enemy, not even from that person in all truthfulness. He uses our own flesh, and the flesh of others to plants seeds of doubt. He allows us to think so many horrible things about ourselves that we want to walk further and further away from God so that we don't have to lean into Him. He thinks he will win this way.
But, Jesus is our victor. He defeated everything when He hung upon that cross, and rose again, and that is the end of it.
Jesus loves us.
There is no mistake, no sin, no horrible deed that He thinks to Himself, "wow, she's a rotten sinner and I don't want her in my Kingdom."
He doesn't say anything like that!
Instead, He says, "come my child, you who are weary and weak, let me carry your burden!" That is what He says, and He truly means it.
So, my friend, if you are struggling to believe, truly believe that Jesus loves you, rest in the total and absolute truth, HE DOES! And if you are struggling to believe that He can change your life, rest in this total and absolute truth, HE CAN. And if you are struggling to even believe that there is a Jesus, I can only say, HE IS REAL AND HE IS ALIVE.
Remember, you are less than only Three.