Transparent Thursday--set the captives free

There were moments in my past where sin held me so captive, I hoped for death. There were days that were so unbearable that I truly asked God to take me from this world and not continue my suffering! That's the real reason I tried to obey and begin this Transparent Thursday series! I felt this urgency to walk with Him as He set captives free--as He did me. I felt this urgency to join Him in a fight that threatened my existence on so many occassions--the fight against a dark and powerful enemy. I don't write these blogs to live in the past, but to reclaim the past honestly. I cannot ever go back and change my past, but I can shine a light on the sins that I lived with so that anyone currently living in them can see that Jesus is very much present in their current circumstances as well. 

That's what I aim to do each week when I write. Sometimes it's hard for me. Not necessarily walking through some of the memories, because the memories don't pain me anymore because I have TRULY been set free; but from the sin that still cripples me at times--the weight of caring too much about what others think of me. That sin, it stops me often. I don't want to write for the simple reason of not wanting someone to "judge" me or "look down on" me. But, He is much stronger than this sin that He is working to eradicate from my life, and He always pushes me and blesses me for my obedience! 

I've shared enough of my testimony for you all to know, I was a walking posterboard for sin! If it was a sin, I was engaged in it. Sex, drugs, lieing, cheating, you name it, I probably engaged in it. The mental games I played with myself, and allowed the enemy in to play with me, oh it threatened to swallow me up. I couldn't understand that what Jesus did on that cross, and then by rising again, that was literally the defeat of sin. Sin COULD literally have no hold on me anymore if I allowed Him to be Lord. 

He can do the same for you. 

He can do the same for this entire world. 

Our nation, and the rest of the world! 

THE ENTIRE WORLD. 

That's what He wants. He doesn't want any of us to be bound by the chains of sin. He doesn't want any of us to have the shackles of sin wrapped around our body, holding us down. No. He wants to set us free. 

I want to see us free; I long to see us free! 

I remember when I was in college, after each sexual tryst, I would call out to Him, but not for healing--instead I would cry out that I was a disgusting, worthless woman not deserving of Him. 

Have you done this, friend? 

Each time I broke His heart. Each time I ignored the truth of His grace and mercy and instead believed the lie that my flesh and the enemy fed me. 

But, He washed all of that away in a moment of surrender. 

In a mere moment of surrender, when I laid down my entire life, held nothing back, He set me free. I couldn't keep bits and pieces to myself, and only let Him have the pieces I thought I couldn't handle. I had to be honest that I could not handle one single piece of my life. 

We all have to admit this. We all have to admit that there isn't a single part of our life that we can handle without Jesus. Pride, arrogance, they'll try and tell us we're good enough. Pride, arrogance, they'll try and convince us that we don't have to admit that mistake, or we don't have to call out to Him because we're doing just fine. 

But, it's not true. Now, that can be hard to hear, I know. I didn't want to hear it, and you may not be ready to hear it as well. And you know what, friend, that's okay. It's okay because Jesus is still with you. That's the most amazing and awe-inspiring part of Jesus. When we push Him aside, when we say we don't need Him, He let's us freely make that choice, but He never walks away. He never says, "okay, he/she has this handled, I'll go help someone else." 

No.

He stays. 

He never goes further than a hand reach. He will always pull us out of the miry pit we find ourselves in. He will always pull us out of the trap we inadvertently step on in a forest filled with traps. 

He is El Shaddai--God Almighty. 

He sets captives free. 

Are you being held captive today? Is there a present sin or a past mistake that you just cannot find relief from? 

I've been there, friend. I find myself there sometimes still, and I can tell you from personal experience, He will pull you out, dust you off--you must do one and one thing only....ASK HIM TO. 

Daily.

Hourly.

Minute by mintue. 

Don't accept that you are worthless. Don't accept that He has washed His hands of you. Instead, reach out to Him and watch as He sets you free, each and everyday.

Remember, you are less than only THree.